ROSE

 

It’s 7:20 in the morning, streets are almost silent, and J is in a daze after a long shift. She pulls up to a red light and gets hit with a flashback.

​

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

 

Solomon:

Would you come visit me if died?

​

J:

Yeah! Would you visit me?!

 

Solomon:

Yuuup. I would come all the time and just bring you one red rose. I'd set it on your tombstone like Uhnnnh!

​

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

 

The “unnh” echoes in J’s in head as she comes back to reality. She cracks a smile and decides to get a red rose for Solomon’s headstone.

 

Arriving to his gravesite with the intention of just laying the rose and saying a quick prayer, she is flooded with the many questions she's been forcing into silence. Her suppressive measures are no match this time. It’s been 10 months and these unanswered questions are growing into boulders, pulling her further down.

 

Desperate for answers, she kneels down to touch his headstone, hoping to feel something. The hard cement and cold marble embellishments only make her feel worse. She moves her hands to the grass as if warmth would be there and places her hands where she imagines his chest would be. Logic isn't near while she grieves so she presses into the earth, expecting everything from a pulse in the ground to a sign from up above, but there is nothing. And the nothingness is the most painful part.

 

She weeps at the silence, weeps at the overwhelming confusion. Inside, she is screaming out WHERE ARE YOU?!